Sex & Dating

5 Signs of a Manipulative Partner, as Told by Jonah Hill

From mastering “therapy speak” to being an outright d-ck.

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This past weekend, actor Jonah Hill‘s ex-partner Sarah Brady revealed texts from their relationship, citing Hill as “emotionally abusive.”

Often when dating, your gut will tell you everything you need to know. However, that doesn’t make it easy to follow — cue the D.W. meme of not being able to read the sign. Especially in the case of Jonah Hill, when a lover knows all of the buzzy therapy terms like “boundaries,” you start to question your own reality.

What makes Hill‘s behavior abusive is the misuse of boundaries. Boundaries are a set of rules you set for yourself to ensure your safety and comfortability. If someone does not respect your boundaries, it’s your duty to remove yourself — not alter someone else’s behavior. Hill made this error when pushing Brady to “rebrand” her social media, in a sense. For example, forcing her to remove all bikini photos, when the attire is a literal part of her job description as a surfer.

When Brady begun to delete what Hill deemed “sexual pictures,” Hill grew frustrated that all imagery wasn’t deleted. In the texts, he acknowledged that their boundaries did not align and that she wasn’t the right partner for him. But instead of removing himself, he continued to double down and attempt to control how she presented herself and her work.

The pair dated for about a year and although they have since split, Brady shared that opening up about her story was essential. “If that’s what it takes for me to be able to be honest, heal, and move forward, then so be it.” Ultimately, this is her way of helping other women avoid the abuse she unknowingly withstood for much time.

Unfortunately for those dating lovers like Hill, its easy to be manipulated out of trusting your gut when someone has mastered therapy speak. So much so, that they convince you that having your own boundaries is abuse. This creates an environment where one lover is constantly walking on eggshells, as to not trigger the other.

Brady, still on a journey of healing, wrote on her Instagram story: “Someone being an emotionally abusive partner doesn’t mean they’re a terrible person (often stems from their own trauma) and at the same time it doesn’t mean it’s ok.”

A word.

Keep reading for five signs of an emotionally abusive partner, as told by Jonah Hill.

Isolating you from your loved ones: In Hill’s case, he berated her everytime she spent time with friends who he did not align with. Taking things a step further, he put down those she loved with terms like “unstable” and “wild.”

Weaponizing therapy terminology: This sets them as the authority, and leaves you with no form of standing up for yourself without seeming mentally unwell or underdeveloped.

Controlling her social media: This is abusive as is, but considering Brady’s career involved her wearing bikini’s, Hill’s controlling ways not only impacted her career, but also any semblance of self-expression she had.

Controlling who she surfs with: In a text listing all of her boundary violations, Hill details that surfing with men is a deal breaker for him. This also further impacts her career, personal interests and community, further isolating her.

Enforcing mysogyny: In the simplest of terms, who the f-ck made him the authority on women’s attire?

In other news, Cardi B is under fire for her lyrics on the remix to “Point Me to the Sluts.”

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